Bunny Business
by arthurismyfave
Summary: Muffy and Buster make a cute couple. Or do they?


Buster opened his asshole wide.

"What is it?" Buster asked.

Muffy removed her head from the gaping maw. "It looks like a rash. Have you been wearing your yoga pants too long?"

"Well you told me not to take them off, so…"

"They just give your butt such great definition!" Muffy said as she switched off her miner's headlamp.

"Thanks babe." Buster winked.

Muffy paused before getting up. She figured that this mental image would come in handy later. In the bath. With candles.

"Babe, what do you want to do for dinner?" Buster asked.

"What do you want to do?" Muffy deferred, still staring at Buster's sweet cheeks.

"How about pizza?" Buster suggested, hopefully.

"Eh, I'm not really feeling that, I'm doing a gluten-free thing right now." Muffy picked some invisible lint off her sweater.

"Well, how about Italian?" Buster proposed.

"You never listen!" Muffy shouted, shrilly. "I literally just said that I can't eat gluten!"

"You could get a salad or something." Buster muttered.

"What are you saying?" Muffy asked, visibly hurt. "Are you trying to imply something?"

"Of course not, I would never." Buster replied, near the end of his rope. "How about Chinese, then? We can't go wrong with that."

"Okay. I was going to suggest that, but I wanted to make sure that was what you wanted."

"Then why did we go through all that?" Buster said, exasperated.

Muffy moved around to Buster's front butt and gave him a kiss on his cheek. "That's why you love me," she said sweetly.

On his way to the Barnes' house to pick up dinner, Buster accidentally tripped over a figure passed out in front of the Sugar Bowl. Crystal balls flew off the makeshift cardboard table that Buster had smashed into on his way down, crashing loudly as they rolled into the street.

"Watch where you're going, bub," a familiar voice slurred. Buster pushed himself up and dusted himself off before peering closely at the woman's face. "Prunella? Is that you?" he asked, unsure. "Who wants to know?" Prunella asked, swatting her arm through the air for emphasis. "It's me, Buster. Gosh, it's been ages!" Buster was about to ask how she had been, but thought better of it.

Prunella slowly slid down the wall of the restaurant into a seated position. "You want to buy something, or what?" she demanded as she glowered at the chump in the too tight pants.

Buster glanced down at the crumpled table. On it were tattered tarot cards, dream catchers that appeared to have pigeon feathers tied into them, and ragged voodoo dolls with what looked to be...fur? "Boy, you know, this all looks good, but I think I have enough crap at home," Buster blurted out, unable to stop himself.

Prunella glared at him and cursed in an unfamiliar language under her breath. Buster laughed at his own joke, tossed a penny into the Elwood Greaves hat next to his former friend, and sauntered away.

That night, before bed, Buster told Muffy about what had happened earlier. "You should have seen her," he said, "it would be funny if it weren't so sad."

Muffy said something, but her voice was muffled by Buster's ass cheeks.

"Speak up or come out, babe, I can't hear you." Buster said.

Two seconds later, he heard the sounds of snoring coming from his butt. "Guess she had a long day," Buster thought to himself, satisfied with his life and happy in his relationship.

Buster woke up the next day feeling a general sense of unease. Still groggy, he realized that he was swimming in his once tight yoga pants, and that he was drowning in his bed's sheets. "Babe?" he squeaked. There was no response.

Suddenly, he was surrounded in morning light, as the sheets were suddenly drawn back. A face loomed over him. "Babe?" Buster squeaked.

"Oh, you are just too cute!" Muffy cooed. "Buster must have run out and gotten you for me as a present to celebrate our seven months, two weeks, and five days anniversary."

Buster began to tremble uncontrollably.

Muffy reached down to pick him up, cuddling him to her bosom.

"BABE?" Buster squeaked.

"Aww, are you trying to talk to me? Are you hungry, do you want some food?"

Muffy fed him until he died.


End file.
